I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
