garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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