some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
