just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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