Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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