last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
