I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I got inside last night via doggy door
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
