I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
