there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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