I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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