Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
