FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
