I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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