So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
