i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
