So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
