Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
