is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
