I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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