I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
