No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
