Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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