You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
