stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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