Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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