You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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