man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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