Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
