Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
