Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
