You're my little dorito
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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