So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I wish there were birth control emojis
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
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