I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
