would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
