went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
