My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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