she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
