Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
