I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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