Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize