If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
