...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
