Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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