We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
