Only a mothe r could love this liver
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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