Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
