Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
