bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
