it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
