The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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